Bhikari- hello dominoz?
Operator- yes
Bikhari- 6 large pizza, 6 garlic bread, 3 pepsi
Operator- kis naam se bheju sir?
.
.
.
.
Bikhari- Allah ke naam pe bhej de re Baba
Dominos
Get together
Son : papa kal school main ek small get together hai..chaloge???
Father : small get together kya hota hai??
Son : only you me and principal...
Question ka must ans
A Pakistani asked a question to tease an Indian : "Indians aur kutto mein kitna fark hai?"
Salute the answer replied by the Indian : "Sirf ek Border ka"
Madrasi
Q4. The Madrasi said, I want to see the movie 'heart is umbrella'...
Which movie did he really want to see..?
Ans:- Dil Chhata Hai...!
������
Lol pj
Q3. Prasad ask's Kumble to bring a pepsi... Kumble brings a bottle of pepsi but goes directly to Tendulkar.? why ??
why ??
Ans:- Tendulkar is an opener
Sita is ram
Q2. SITA RAM HAI TO SITA KAUN HAI
Ans - . Sita MEMORY hai (RAM: Random Access Memory)
������
Ram is sita
��DEADLY PJs��
Pls... scrol down at ur own risk...
Q1. RAM SITA HAI ... TO RAM KAUN HAI ?? ...
Ans - . TAILOR ( darzi )
������
Laptop
1 girl went 2 electronics shop wid anger & threw her new laptop on d desk at person from whom she bought. She told d salesman tat u hv cheated me. I cannot transfer file from my previous laptop...Salesman: Madam, can u pls try in front of me? This is what she did:
1)Right clicked d mouse on d file, selected COPY option.
2) Disconnected d mouse.
3)Took tat mouse carefully & connected 2 d new laptop
4)Right clicked d mouse & selected PASTE option. Salesman DIED!!!
Relaxating
Sardar was lying on beach,
Amrican: R u Relaxing?
Sardar: No i m GopalSingh,
Anothr Amrcn: R u relaxing?
Sardar: No
I m gopal Singh
Anothr Amrcn: R u relaxing?
Sardar: No (Shouting)
I m gopal Singh
Sardar left tht place in anger.
Then Sardar asks one American
lying nearby
R u relaxing?
American: Yes.
Sardar slaps him & says,
Haramkhor sab tujhe dhund rahe
hain aur tu yahan leta hua hai
Four zero
'Chaar ZERO
ek saat'
likho.
Likha ? Kaise ?
0000 aise ?
Fail !
Correct ans'4017'
Maa-baap ne kitni ummeedo se paddhaya. Sab paani me gaya
To study
Galileo used 'Lamp' to Study, Graham bell used 'Candle' to study, Shakshpeare studied in 'Street lights' But .....
Do u know about Rajnikant......????
Only Agarbatti...
Fail hone ka reason
Exam me fail hone ki wajah kya
di hain, aaj k honhaar students
ne ??
.
.
1 saal ke 365 din hote hai.. .
Roz 8 ghante sone ke Yani pure
saal
ke 122 din
.
365-122=243 .
aur summer vacation gino 61
din..
243-61=182 din
.
Usme 52 sunday.. .
182-52=130 din..
.
Diwali - holi etc... Festival ke
40..
. College festival 15 din
[40 15=55]
.
130-55=75 din.
.
Khane pine nahane ke 3 ghante ke
hisab se 46 din..
.
75-46=29 din.
.
Roj ke 1 ghante dosto ke.. Uske 15 din..
.
29-15=14 din..
.
Ab hum 10 din to bimar bhi
rahte hai..
.
14-10=4 din bache..
.
T.V dekhne ke 3 din..
. 4-3=1 din bacha Yaar
.
1 saal me 1 din hi to birthday
aata
hai Ab birth day ke din kon
padhe yaar..??.
Parent's shocked Student's
rocked... Jaldi Jaldi Jaldi Jaldi
Share karo! Bilkul naya Bawaal
hai ye!
Catching squirrels
How to catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and just be yourself. Squirrels will come to you on their own. Because they just love NUTS !
Munna bhai
Munna Bhai Ke ghar LADKI hUE.
Circuit- Bhai ab to muhale ke, Sare ladke isko
line marenge.
MUNNA- Tu fikar mat kar re, Apun iska naam
DIDI rakhenge.
Never Mess with Kids
Never Mess with Kids :
A man was seated next to a kid in an airplane. The
man turned to him and said, "Let's talk".
Kid: Ok, what do we talk about ?
Man (making fun of d kid): How about nuclear power?
Kid: Very interesting topic. But let me ask u a
question... Horse, cow & deer, all eat grass. Yet deer
excretes pellets, cow flat potty & horse clumps.
Why?
Man: I don't know.
Child: Do you really feel qualified enough to discuss
nuclear issues when you dont know shit..
Couldn't stop sharing this one...
Santa phones an ambulance
Santa phones an ambulance because his mate Banta been hit by a car......
Santa: 'Get an ambulance here quick, he's bleeding from his nose and ears and I tink both his legs are broken.'
Operator: 'What is your location sir?'
Santa: 'Outside number 28 Connaught Place .'
Operator: 'How do you spell that sir?'
Silence.... (heavy breathing) and after a minute.
Operator: 'Are you there sir?'
More heavy breathing and another minute later.
Operator: 'Sir, can you hear me?'
This goes on for another few minutes until....
Operator: 'Sir, please answer me. Can you still hear me?'
Santa: 'Yes, sorry bout dat...
I couldn't spell Connaught place, so I just dragged him round to M G road
Marwadi & Chinese in a train.
Marwadi & Chinese in a train.
A cockroach enters.
Chinese catches it & eats it!
Another cockroach enters.
Marwadi catches & asks d chinese: Kharidego ?
Historic pj
Historic PJ-
Aurangazeb: senapati batao ki hum Shivaji ko kyu Nahi dhund pa rahe hain??
Senapati: kyoki Maharaj hum Mughal Hain, Google Nahi
BEST FOOTBALL JOKE EVER ?
BEST FOOTBALL JOKE EVER ?
Question-What Do You Do After India Wins The Football World Cup ?
Answer.
Switch Off The Playstation
Marte waqt
Banta: Marte waqt aadmi ko kya dena chahiye?
Santa: Birla cement.
Banta: Kyun?
Santa: Kyunki is Cement mein jaan hai
Food
Husband calls his wife in the evening n asks....
Husband: Aaj khaane mein kya pakaya hai?
Wife : Fine long grain white rice hand-picked in the emerald green lap of the Vindhyas and tender golden lentils that was gently simmered over the smouldering kisses of angels.served with dollops of fragrant clarified butter
Husband : WOW...SOUNDS YUMMY??
WHAT IS IT CALLED?
Wife : Khichdi!
D best "oops!"
D Best "Oops!"
Moment of SKUL LIFE..
Wen D Teacher is lukin 4 Some1 to Answer d Question
& u Accidently make an Eye-Contact!!:D;)
Lol joke
Sardar ne 1 raah chalti ajnabi ladki se kaha:- Aapne pehchana mujhe ko.
Ladki:- Nahi aap koun ho..?
Sardar:- Main wahi hu jisko aapne
parso bhi nahi pehchana tha.
Sardar got an sms
Sardar got an sms from his
Girlfriend written as "I Miss You".
Sardar ne apna dimag laga ke 2 ghante baad reply bheja "I Mr.You".
Daant !!
Dr.:- Aapke 3 daant kaise tut
gaye..?
Sardar:- Ji wo wife ne kadak roti banai thi.
Dr.:- To khane se mana kar dete.
Sardar:- Ji wo hi to kiya tha...
Interview
Interviewer: Civil engineering kyun kiya?
Me: Builder banna tha
Interviewer: Koi bhi ek famous builder ka naam batao?
Me: Bob The Builder
#Rejected
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